Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I hate cancer

When the doctor said, "colon cancer" I froze. My mom had colon cancer? Did I hear the doctor correctly? Was I dreaming? No, it wasn't a dream. It was....all too real. My thoughts were all over the place in those moments. Will she be okay? What will I do without my mom? Those of you that know me know that I didn't have a relationship with my father so she was the only parent I had.

Three days later we sat in the surgeon's office and mapped out the plan of attack. The prognosis looked good. He would remove her whole colon. She had scans that showed that the cancer had not spread so once he removed the colon the cancer would be gone. It would be a long road of recovering but overall things looked good. I could breathe again. Thank you Lord.

Three days later we were at the hospital ready for the operation. It was a long day of waiting but the surgery went well and they removed her colon. No further treatment needed. All the cancer was gone and now we could get on with our lives. Except that's not what happened. I won't go into all the details because honestly they are still too painful. She wasn't healing properly from the surgery and went into septic shock and everything happened so fast. Three weeks after I took my mom in for the colonoscopy she went home to be with Jesus. I didn't get to say goodbye and that was incredibly hard.

I shared the story of losing my mom in the middle of our adoption story for a reason. She played a role in our adoption as you'll soon find out.

To be continued....

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